LEMONANANUT BARS

In the past, I have been a follower of recipes but getting back into the blog has inspired me to start inventing because it is much more exciting to post about a recipe I created, especially when I’ve made up a name for it! LEMONANANUT! Pronounced Lem-OH!-nananut! These are a lemon bar with some new exciting additions. The bottom is a cashew crust, middle layer is a fudgy white chocolate and banana, the top is lemon curd, and there is coconut all through out. This is also no bake, but it does require some stovetop action for the lemon curd. I made a half recipe in a loaf pan to prevent myself eating an entire pan of them. If you cut them small you can still get around twelve from the half recipe. I provided amounts for both because when I’m doubling or halving a recipe I always forget to change one of the ingredient amounts (there was an incident with some ketchup that I don’t want to think about).

Ingredients:

CRUST:

Loaf:	8x8:
⅓ c.	⅔ c.	roasted salted cashews
⅓ c.	⅔ c.	cheerios
5-6	10-12	dates
1½ tsp	3 tsp	honey
1½ Tbsp	3 Tbsp	coconut butter*

*This is not the same as coconut oil. It is ridiculously expensive to buy (Nut butter prices are one of my main problems with the economy these days.) but supah cheap and easy to make yourself. I learned how here!

WHITE CHOCOLATE BANANA LAYER:

Loaf:	8x8:
¾ c.	1½ c.	white chocolate chips
½ (25g)	1 (50g)	banana
¼ c.	½ c.	shredded unsweetened coconut

LEMON CURD:

Loaf:	8x8:
⅛ c.	¼ c.	lemon juice
1 tsp.	2 tsp.	lemon zest
1½ *	3	eggs
¼ - ½ c.	½ - 1 c.	sugar

*I needed an egg wash for something else I was making so I used the extra half egg for that, but I’m sure two eggs would be fine here.

+ a couple tablespoons of shredded unsweetened coconut to sprinkle on top

Directions:

1. MAKING THE CRUST:
First pulse the cashews in a food processor a few times, just to break them up a bit. Then add the rest of the ingredients and wizz until all combined. The cashew don’t need to be ground finely, they add a nice texture. If you don’t have a food processor, you could do this in a blender but I would recommend bashing the cashews in a ziplock bag a bit first. Then line the bottom of the pan with wax or parchment paper and press the mixture into the bottom.

2. WHITE CHOCOLATE BANANA FUDGY GOODNESS:
Melt the chips in the microwave or in a double boiler. Mash the banana, make it really smooth, you don’t want banana lumps in this. Mix the banana and shredded coconut into the melted chocolate. This will have an extremely strange texture while it is warm, somewhere between melted marshmallows and troll boogies. It is very difficult to spread over the crust. I would not suggest using your fingers and licking them clean when necessary because although that would be effective, it is also totally unsanitary and not something I would ever do. Once it’s spread as evenly as possible, stick it in the fridge while you make the curd.

3. CURDY CURD:
[About the sugar: The recipe I used for this said a half cup of sugar, but that seemed like a lot to me so I did a very scant half cup, but even then the curd came out pretty sweet. Personally I like my lemon desserts on the tart side, so I ended up adding extra lemon juice. If I make this again I’m just going to cut down the sugar even more. So basically for the half recipe, ¼ c. would be very tart and ½ c. would be very sweet.]
Put all the ingredients into a double boiler over simmering water and whisk until thickened, about ten minutes. It is a good idea to put this through a sieve to remove any scrambled egg, but if you are confident in your whisking abilities or just impatient, you can skip that. For me it was 20% confidence in whisking and 80% impatience. Put it in the fridge for a couple minutes.

4. TOASTING THE COCONUT:
Put the coconut in a skillet over medium-low heat and keep mixing until it is golden brown. This happens fast so don’t step away and keep moving it around.

5. FINAL ASSEMBLY:
Pour the slightly cooled curd over the fudge layer, spread evenly, and sprinkle the toasted coconut on top. Refrigerate for a couple hours, then remove from pan and slice into bars.

YUMMMMM

These are so so good! I highly suggest making the curd on the tart side because it pairs really well with the creamy sweetness of the middle layer. These cannot be stacked and might not travel that well because the curd stays pretty soft. But if you are like me and only need them to travel from the pan to your mouth, it’s fine.
I was pretty nervous when the melted chocolate and mashed banana mixture had such a strange texture, but once it cools it is just smooth and creamy and gooood. It has given me ideas about using banana in fudge, like what about milk chocolate plus peanut butter plus banana? Sounds amazing! Or white chocolate and banana but with nutmeg and cinnamon and allspice and cardamom, so it’s like a chai fudge? OR almond butter and banana and maple syrup and just a tiny bit of white chocolate? Oh my goodness, sometimes I have ideas! Sometimes I have TOO MANY IDEAS!

While making this, I listened to Belle and Sebastian, as usual!

I also need to mention that the kitty of my life is laying on me right now. It is making typing rather difficult, but he was very persistent and I cannot resist the love of a cat!

These two recipes inspired some of the flavor combinations:

Vanilla Lemon Swirl Bars

Raw Lemon Cashew Cheesecake
And the lemon curd recipe is adapted from this one.

BEET GNOCCHI

I pretty much see eighteen thousand recipes a day that I think look amazing (see foodgawker.com), but this is one I felt an immediate need to make. BEET GNOCCHI is such a brilliant idea, I can't even believe it. But the shock of the century this meal was that the gnocchi didn't even turn to be the best part. The site I found the recipe on had a pesto to serve them with which sounded really good. But Oh NO! I don't have any basil! But wait I have the ingredients for the besto pesto of your life: ARUGULA and PISTACHIOS! It was meant to be. I could (and did) eat this plain. Prepare yourself for the amazingness.

Ingredients:
Serves 2

GNOCCHI:
2 medium/largish beets (with tops!!)
1½ - 2 c. all purpose flour (plus extra for dusting)
¼ tsp. salt
freshly ground pepper
[some bozos put an egg but that is so unnecessary, i don't even know why i'm mentioning it.]

PESTO:
2 c. arugula
¼ c. roasted pistachios
⅛ - ¼ c. olive oil
2 cloves garlic
Squeeze of lemon juice
Salt/pepper to taste (if you use salted pistachios like me, you'll barely need to add any at all)

Directions:
1. Roasting the beets:
Beets are the slowest cooking little trolls in the world so keep this in mind if you decide to make this. Preheat oven to 425F. Cut the tops off the beets, I also suggest cutting them into smaller pieces so they cook faster. Then rub a bit of olive oil on them, wrap them in tin foil, and pop them in the oven. Check them every 20 mins or so. Mine took an hour.
2. Besto Pesto:
While those badboys are in the oven, get the pesto ready. Put everything in a food processor and WIZ! Boom! Most delicious thing of you life.

3. Prepare Tops:
The beets are still in the oven, obviously, so prepare the tops. Cut the stems off at the base of the leaf. Then, stack them up and cut into 1 in. ribbons. Wash and set aside.
4. Burn Your Fingers:
Thank GOD, the beets are finally done. You’ve waited long enough, don’t bother letting them cool just start peeling right away. If you squeeze the 400 degree beet in your bare hand your skin the peel will slide right off.
5. WIZZZZ:
Put the beets in a food processor (blender would probs work too) and puree those chumps until smooth.
6. Make Dough:
In a large bowl add the first cup of flour and in the center form a crater? ditch? what is the technical term for this? Dump the beet puree in the hole? depression? why do these all sound wrong? Mix with your hands and keep adding flour until you have a soft dough that’s not too sticky.
7. Form Gnocchi:
Sprinkle flour on a clean surface. Cut dough into four equal parts. Roll each into a rope ½ in. thick. Cut into ¾in pieces. The size doesn’t matter that much, just make them the size and shape you find pleasing in your mouth. Let them sit about 15 min. (5 if you’ve had it with these beets making you wait)

8. Cook ‘Em:
Bring salted water to boil in a medium sized sauce pan. Drop around 8 in at a time. When they float to the top them are ready. Scoop them out into a colander. Sometimes they stick to the bottom and can't float up so I like to give them stir a minute into cooking in case this happens.
9. Tops:
Before adding your last batch, heat 1 Tbsp. olive oil in a pan. After adding the last batch, toss the tops into the pan and sautee about 4 minutes until they are wilted and dark and one millionth  their original size. When all the gnocchi are done toss them in with the greens to warm them back up and then remove from heat.
10. SERVE!

Not only are these delicious, they are the most beautiful gnocchi you’ll ever see! These pictures don’t even do them justice (my camera makes everything and everyone uglier than they really are). The pesto goes with them and pretty much anything very well. If you want to make this for more people, it’s easy: just have one beet per person. Also, this is vegan and can easily be made gluten free by using the equivalent amount of rice flour.

While making this I listened to an episode of Radiolab and once again had my mind blown. 
Click here to listen/download!  
SPOILER ALERT: Deluminators are possible! What ?! (Okay, okay, somewhat possible/on the road to being possible. There is a troll here who is raining on my parade with his trollish lack of excitement)


Recipe inspired by: What's Cooking Good Looking